I don’t think children remember their first seven or so birthdays

stupid kids I really can’t stand ‘em

but I’ve stopped cussing in front of ‘em recently ‘cause

My oh my, I do like to think I’d be a good mother

or fine enough at least

if I ever manage again to love a man enough

for him to stick around and dress ya up

teach ya sports but only enough

to watch ‘em and have a little somethin’ to say

or maybe play ‘em in the park with ya brother

I say

I wanna grand life so I don’t gotta admit I just want

ya father to love me enough

money in my back pocket to get by 

and dance in the kitchen with black & white tiles 

ya know in our

studio apartment with dim lights ‘cause

we don’t got time to call the landlord or whateva

(ya father might not be handy ‘cause he’s gonna know

the difference between tartar and tartare and won’t eva

wear white after Labor Day) and

brick by brick it builds up in front of me… ya know:

I'm not the kinda girl who can fill a bucket list with fantastical dreams.

I'm so done with paint spilling and drying and getting stuck to my feet.

My bucket list is full I don’t wanna fill it no more I just want

You dancing in the kitchen in a light pink linen dress

(or whatever color ya like most) ha!

I hope you’re different from me I hope ya like avocado on toast.

Wilhelmina my Sweet, Something

hit me on this April afternoon. I think I lost & found it

when I was nineteen or twenty-something like That 

is what I mean when I say 

I want a little life: something (I k)new

familiar enough to never let me down

different enough to let me be loud

I’ve spent my whole life planting forget-me-nots in broken vases

the water dries up I forget to clip the stems

I keep growing up without ever calming down

Wilhelmina my Sweet, Someday

I’m gonna find a man for ya and ya know

it turns out I have a maternal instinct deep down inside me

(Alegra told me so. She came before ya.)

Oh, Wilhelmina my Sweet Someone

is gonna love ya so very much

and the two of ya will lay on the beach, sandy skin soaking

in the sun for hours and laugh togetha

about me ‘cause you’re gonna 

love the sun more than I do and

ya won’t have my tan or my attitude.